Grace

this girl wrote:

"Why is it so much harder to be gracious then it is to spew anger and venom?
Perhaps it's the person involved
Perhaps it's my frustration at a vanilla life situation
Perhaps it's dealing with old feelings of rejection brought on by the night before He left.
Perhaps it's PMS
Perhaps it's that i just need more sleep
Perhaps it's the person involved
Perhaps it's me! (what? me? pfft! perish the thought!)

i WANT to 'spew' grace - or spread grace or exude grace or share grace"


This whole area is an important one for Me, and I've written on this more than once.

All those possible reasons that this girl listed could very well be factors -- they usually are. I find that most people's orientation is to the right thing, unless other stuff gets in the way. And yeah, that other stuff can be lack of sleep or PMS or not fitting into your jeans or stupid girl stuff or stupid boy stuff or stupid job stuff or (insert any one of 6,594 other things here). It happens to us all.

Grace, in this context, can really be defined as "being less under the influence of 'stuff' than the other person currently is." And being less under the influence of stuff is the result of being able to take that little pause I've harped on written about before.

Grace is breathing. Stop. Walk around the block. Twice. Run in place a minute or two. Watch three minutes of Sanford and Son on TV Land. Realize that whatever you're momentarily angry about is much less important than what you're about to give away by giving in to that anger.

Grace is creating that tiny little bit of clear space inside. And almost magically, once opened up, a realization pops into that space. The realization that anger is its own punishment, that the anger and bitterness of the other person diminishes that person, not you. The realization that expressing that anger and bitterness, while it might feel momentarily liberating, is slowly but inexorably imprisoning us in a way of thinking and feeling that is self-limiting and ultimately destructive.

Grace, this sought after, golden thing that differentiates adult from adolescent, Master or Mistress from control freak, submissive from brat, is achieved by the consistent application of the most prosaic, almost silly things. Grace is stopping one pattern and starting another. And once started that pattern is joyfully hard to stop. And gradually one, in this girl's words, spews grace.

YouTube Tuesday: Another Dumb Blonde

Staying in the pop vein since there was such an overwhelming response to OK Go last week (ZERO comments! OMG can you believe it??? Keep 'em coming!).

Tonight's clip is "Another Dumb Blonde" by Hoku, from the forgettable Disney film Snow Day. (Hoku is the daughter of the late Don Ho.)

"Another Dumb Blonde" is a perfectly-constructed piece of pop, really. And Hoku's sincerity totally sells the song. I expected Hoku to have a big career, but the movie bombed and at the time Britney and Christina were skanking their way to the top and Hoku came off as way too innocent.

Great song, great performance, fun video. I'm not sure how the Zen perfection of zero comments can be topped, but give it a shot.

YouTube Tuesday: Here It Goes Again

I'm a sucker for a well-executed power pop song. Toss in a cute video and you've got the whole package.

"Here It Goes Again" by OK Go is a great power pop song, and the video features some very innovative choreography.

Profound? No. Thought-Provoking? No. Socially or politically significant? No.

Just good clean fun. We remember clean, don't we?

The End of the Beginning?

It's a couple of months later and still so little inspires Me in the way of "essay" material.

A big part of it, I know, is My reluctance to re-address topics Ive already written about. On the important topics in this lifestyle, My views haven't changed. And I've written them here. In situations where My view has changed, I've written about that.

But I need to bear in mind that in this rolling medium what's not on the front page is basically non-existent and make more of an effort to re-address certain important themes.

It is more that that, though. It feels like a more significant shift in My focus.

This is not the end of the blog. I love writing and publishing the fiction and this is as good a medium as any. That is why this post wasn't titled "The Beginning of the End?"; I have no intention of terminating this blog any time soon. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning in that the blog might become almost totally focused on the stories.

Of course, this could all be silly stuff. . . tomorrow I might hear some totally innocuous remark and spin a long think piece from it. And perhaps that changes My outlook on everything and essays start pouring out.

So maybe it's the middle of the beginning. Um, the early middle.

YouTube Tuesday: Ebay, A La Weird Al

Tonight's entry -- a video of "Ebay" by Weird Al, set to the tune of "I Want It That Way."

As with all of Weird Al's best work, "Ebay" is both hilariously true and hilariously exaggerated. I'd venture to guess that just about everyone knows at least one Ebayer like this (um . . . or is one).

A Few Thoughts For The Day (Or, As Close To A Rant As I Get)

1. Just becasue I stopped responding doesn't mean I agree with you.

2. Just becasue I don't respond to a dig with a dig deosn't mean I didn't "get" it. I got it. I just decided to leave you down there and stay up here.

3. Being nice is, for Me, an effort to stay on what feels like the right path for Me. It doesn't mean I'm weak, or stupid.

I could go on, but I feel much better now. Happy Monday.

The Thinking Blogger Award

Tagged!

The wonderful taylor tagged Me by awarding Me with a "Thinking Blogger Award." taylor wrote of Me: "Another absolutely fabulous writer, Lenora's blog is an addiction for me as well. Whether she's writing about lifestyle topics, or naughty fiction, or random articles about life, or even her critique of various music videos, she always has something intriguing to say. It's been an absolute pleasure to have found her blog in its early days and been able to follow it all along." Thank you so much, taylor . . . I'm honored.

The rules of the Thinking Blogger meme go like this:


"Should you choose to participate, please make sure you pass this list of rules to the blogs you are tagging. I thought it would be appropriate to include them with the meme. The participation rules are simple:

1. If, and only if, you get tagged, write a post with links to 5 blogs that make you think,

2. Link to this post so that people can easily find the exact origin of the meme,

3. Optional: Proudly display the 'Thinking Blogger Award' with a link to the post that you wrote (here is an alternative silver version if gold doesn't fit your blog)."

As you might imagine (or maybe you might not), the issue with these multi-branching memes is that one quickly runs out of suitable places to branch to. Four bloggers I would've given serious consideratoin to for this award have already been tagged, and their selections each have wiped out a big chunk of My pool of potential awardees. Subtract a few that are good candidates but currently on hiatus, and the field rapidly narrows.

So here goes. I am only going to tag two, to do My part to combat MEES (Meme Early Expiration Syndrome). In memes, less is more when it comes to tagging. Think of it as the "catch and release" of meme-ing.

1. desiree. So difficult to describe or classify, desiree's blog is an addiction that I can't put down. Even when I stay away for a while I'm always drawn back to her brutally honest depiction of herself, her circle, her life. And it's done with humor, wit, and insight.

2. Dirty Prom Queen. WryGirl's journey through marriage/separation/starting over. She manages in so few words to convey so much. Great reading that illustrates that so often, just life itself is the most compelling story.

Happy Easter, all. KAHTATUS.

Three Years

Today marks three years that storm is with Me.

she knows how I feel about her, but it bears repeating here: storm, thank you so much so loving and serving Me so well these past three years. Thank you for being you . . . your submission and devotion inspire Me, as much today as ever.

I love you. Happy Anniversary.

YouTube Tuesday: The Best Book Ever

Tonight's entry is from a series of short videos called Tales of Mere Existence. All are excellent, but this one, about setting out to write the Best Book Ever, hit home with Me, since, like everyone who writes at all, I've had those moments where I sneer at the hack on Good Morning America being worshipped and having scads of money thrown at him/her for writing what is decidedly not the Best Book Ever.

Very well done, poignant, intentionally or otherwise, so true, and funny.

Opening Day

I am a baseball fan, so obviously I love Opening Day.

Corny as it is, the promise of a 0-0 record, the opportunity for fans of even the worst teams to let themselves believe for a little while . . . all this happening as spring starts to slowly pry winter's grip from the landscape. It is inspiring.

Over on the baseball blog I'll have some Opening Day observations posted at some point tonight or tomorrow, for those who might care about the actual baseball stuff.

But it's Opening Day for us all.

Happy Opening Day to you. The most American non-holiday holiday there is.